5 Things That Worked for Me in 2018

Prioritizing Family Over Other People

That picture to the left, is my favorite of the year. My two girls right before their homecoming dance. Cliche proven, “blink and they will be all grown up.” I decided this year, that I only have a little time left with my kids living at home. I have 2 sons already in college, and I can start to feel what it’s like to let them go. I’m not a genius, but I’m smart enough to know that when I’m older, I won’t regret spending more time with my family and less with others during this critical season in our lives. I once was a pastor and know what it feels like to try to spread the time around to countless people. This year, I simply decided not to try. I want my wife and kids to feel like I always pick up their phone call (or call them right back), that I’m around more than I’m not, and that I chase them around their various commitments to be present in their environments. I’ve had to stop caring if I disappoint others, or that I might be missing key networking opportunities to further my career. I’m sure I’ll have time for that later.

Orange Theory

Like most of us, each year I plan to improve my fitness. Most years I fail horribly. That changed for me in 2018 thanks to OrangeTheory. Towards the end of 2017, I saw a buddy at the beach and was blown away by how much weight he had lost and how fit he looked. He was a retired pro surfer, and in good athletic form, but he shed a bunch of weight and looked super healthy. I asked him, “Bryan, why do you look so good?” (Yes I felt pretty cheesy asking that question). He said, “OrangeTheory!” For the next two weeks he hounded me until I signed up, and then was relentless to make sure I kept doing the classes.

The first few weeks were BRUTAL! I didn’t realize how out of shape I was. The format demands that you keep your appts. (sign up on an app) or you get dinged money. That is a pretty strong incentive for me. After a few weeks, I was hooked. For some reason, the format allows me to push myself at the right level, keep progressing, and want to come back. The proof is in the pudding. In 2018, I lost a little over 20 lbs., dropped my mile time from 10 minutes to under 7 minutes, and consistently go 3-5 times a week, even if I’m traveling to another city. Their app is easy, coaches are great, and it’s great to work out with people from all levels of fitness. Try it - OrangeTheory

Writing A Personal Business Plan

I’m in sales, and staying focused is a challenge. It’s easy to get caught up in non-productive activity that doesn’t lead to great results. I tend to be a planner, so I try to write simple plans that I can follow and that have clear objectives. In 2018, this process worked very well. I wrote an aggressive plan that attempted to double my sales quota for the year. It was ambitious, but I felt like the opportunity was there to do it. There was no magic in the plan. It simply gave me a guide throughout the year, and it worked. I surpassed the targets written in the plan. I put the following in the plan:

Goals - No groundbreaking secret here. I set specific targets in terms of # of new clients, # of deals, and total $ amount goal for the year. I also included personal development goals and networking goals.

Strategy - I spent some time thinking about a game plan. How am I going to try to achieve the goals above? What has worked in the past? What doesn’t? What new tactics can I try?

Actions - A short list of tasks that I will hold myself accountable for the year. These are not housekeeping tasks, but strategic actions that will move me towards my goals.

People + Clients - I identify the relationships and companies that I will focus on for the year. This is hard, because the opportunities seem endless, but the planning process forces me to focus on top opportunities. It also forces me to face my own limits and be realistic with my own capacity. I’d like to be like Zig Ziglar, but have to be ok with being the best Pete I can instead.

Calendar - Simple scheduling. I layout the year with key events, travel, and personal time. I also look for seasons where I can double down on prospecting/business development.

Writing One Page Life Plan

I read a fascinating book last Fall called Measure What Matters, by John Doerr. At first glance it looks like a real sleeper, one more book on management tactics, a real page turner. But, Doerr recounts his incredible experience of using “OKR’s - Objectives + Key Results” to guide the success at Intel and Google. The power is in the simplicity of identifying the most important objective and key results a team must focus on within the organization.

For me, the book most impacted my personal life. I struggled to answer the question, “What is my most important objective, and the key results I want to see personally?” Real quickly, so many of the objectives I aim for seem to fall short (i.e. financial security, job satisfaction, relationships, travel, etc.). Ultimately, when I die, what is going to matter most. As a Christian, it hit me, that the most important question to ask might be, “what will it be like to stand before God when I die?” Sorry to drop the heavy bomb, but that seriously has been haunting me. Scripture says there will be one of two answers, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” or “I never knew you.” Not really a middle ground is given, believe me, I’ve looked for it.

So, I set out to write a simple life plan using the OKR format. The #1 objective for me now is to be able to hear, “Well done…” when I pass on from this life to the next. It was weird, how as soon as I wrote those words on a page, my stress reduced. I’m not responsible for accomplishing all that is in my head (thank God!). I’m not in control, really at all, at the outcomes in my life (I realized this when I was shot 12 years ago. Shameless plug, please read - Shot: The Book). Instead, I get to serve God everyday to the fullest. The life plan I wrote did not create lofty goals centered on my need for accomplishment, but instead identified dreams I hope to experience in my life and those around me. They are still ambitious, and are still goal oriented. But strangely, I am more motivated to see them come to pass by recognizing that I can let go of control and simply enjoy the process.

Narrowing Down My List of Friends

Most difficult shift I made all last year. I realized that social media keeps me connected to a growing number of people that have had significance in my life, but that I know longer interact with and probably won’t in the future. For me, a relational person, that can cause stress feeling like I’m loosing touch with friendships. With a good deal of change in our lives the last three years, we’ve had to let go of many relationships. It’s been easy to feel a bit isolated.

So last year, I made a small list of friendships I’d invest in. That was tough, because I left some names off that I really care for. I wasn’t deciding to cut them out of my life. It’s always great to catch up with old friends. Instead, I decided to not worry about not calling them or trying to stay up on their lives. I planned instead to make room for the few friendships that were a part of my present season as well as for life-long friends that require extra effort because they live in another part of the country or world. This worked. It gave me freedom to clear the space in my head of who I spent time and communicated with. It gave me time to take a couple trips with my best friend from college and his family. It gave me time to take a great surf trip with a friend and my boys, as well another surf trip with a group of buddies in So Cal. Ironically enough, it gave me space to make new friends as well. I think before social media, we gave ourselves more permission to move on. Christmas cards were enough to keep contact with people we’ve moved away from. I think this year, I’m going even less on social media, and will try to do a family Christmas card for the first time in a while.